Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize