why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
