Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
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