Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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