My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
