i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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