I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize