i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
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