So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
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