Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
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