So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
