Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize
