Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize
