Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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