Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
