That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
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