dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
