So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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