We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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