like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
