Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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