people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Randomize
