Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
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