I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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