it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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