People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize