i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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