I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
