dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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