playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
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