then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
