Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Randomize
