Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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