why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize