I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Randomize