she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
