so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
