At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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