Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize