gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
