soooo we both peed the bed last night...
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
