walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
