Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Randomize
