Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
