who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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