thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
