Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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