help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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