we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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