He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
