This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Randomize